People keep asking me “are you excited?” And the answer is: no. The most apt description, at best, is “butterflies.” I don’t look forward to all the time on a plane. And I don’t really look forward to having an entire system in my body destroyed, followed by months / years of recovery.
But I look forward to the future. I’m excited about the possibilities after those months / years of recovery. And I believe I will start being able to plan for the future again, instead of bracing for the future. But right now, right now I’m trying NOT to brace for the future. I am willing to step in front of this bus, because I believe it will lead to the greater good.